We Will Destroy Your Planet

For over a hundred years, Aliens have been trying to take over the Earth, but every time they have failed, often in the most unlikely ways. Well, no more! We Will Destroy Your Planet offers our future alien overlords all of the information necessary to bring humanity to its knees. Planning for an interstellar, or even intergalactic, conquest is a complex affair, that even races which have mastered faster than light travel might find difficult. This book offers practical, 'how-to' advice on a variety of topics including logistics, environmental factors, and of course human weaknesses. It also goes into the big question of 'why' you want to destroy or enslave the Earth, as this is crucial in determining which strategy and tactics to employ. Once that has been determined, the book follows as step-by-step approach to annihilating human resistance, suggesting the best and worst weapons, and giving guidelines on just how much destruction is optimal. With this book in hand, there is little doubt that humans are now in their last generation as masters of the Earth.

Attacking the Earth /Surface Operations /Weapons and Martial Arts /Living on Earth /Looking After Your Humans /Collateral Damage /Special Cases /A History of Alien Invasions